This is for the person I miss the most, the awesome lawyer celebrating his birthday at a time of celebrating cemeteries. Well, he does have a flair for making even grim things worth celebrating. Because he’s turned my once dead heart into a heart that’s giddily and so much in love.
I found it funny how dating you began only after reading the affirming lines of a book on sale. And like my love for books, my love for you just keeps growing everyday. I was frightened to get close to you (which you mistook for being suplada during your bar exam thanksgiving and my refusal to reply to your text messages sometimes).
Before you arrived in my life, I was fully convinced that my sole role in life was to write about other people’s happy love stories because I failed miserably in all my previous attempts at romance. I was beyond strike three with my fair share of heartaches, some of which were self-induced.
For years, I felt like God did not have me in mind when He created Mr. Right for most of my friends. But even as I thought that, followed my Feng Shui stuff in 2010 and placed images of horses as wallpaper on my desktop for around five to six months. That was supposedly an invitation for romance for Ox zodiac signs like us.
I did not know that God was actually saving the best for last. Exactly twenty seven years ago from today, you were born. Your arrival in my life was just in time. From an indifferent textmate, I became the very vocal and occasionally fierce girlfriend.
We became textmates a month after our respective licensure exams. We weren’t close yet but I found it easy to tell you my anxieties and excitement as I took my first fulltime job in the publishing industry. I didn’t know that after getting our own licenses, we will also get from each other our license to be happy and in love at a different degree.
Since that time when we were starting out in our careers, we’ve been together and this relationship has grown more solidly. It took six months of internal struggles before I agreed to have that coffee date with you one fateful Saturday. And now I am enjoying more than one year of love from you, my significant other.
We even went to Our Lady of Guadalupe church together that first date. (I think she blessed this relationship because we had her during our first date.) I may not have mentioned it, but when you stepped inside that church while the priest was dispensing his homily, I felt mesmerized by you for a moment there. And I thanked God that instant because I followed that book’s advice and took a chance with you. I was just wearing my usual T-shirt and jeans, but inside I felt taller and grander than the Eiffel Tower.
And there are countless things you have taught me, with these 27 things standing out:
1. Giving people the benefit of the doubt (not being tamang hinala)
2. Setting boundaries especially against abusive people
3. Thinking the opposite of my neurotic thoughts
4. Appreciating family traditions (as I never had a normal family setup) and the concept of a tight family bonding
6. Respect for you and for myself
7. The love language of service
8. Making sacrifices over and above the call of duty
10. Full acceptance of the people we love, faults and all (I cried when you laughed and kissed me after accidentally reading the notebook containing my most horrible sin confessions to the priest. You did torture me a little first by teasing and asking all sorts of insane questions.)
11. Asking logical questions
12. Asking questions that have meaningful answers
13. Listening well
14. Giving up certain comforts out of love for others
15. Love for my profession (because you loved yours immensely and I found out later that I love engineering just as much)
16. Really sharing myself and opening myself up to the vulnerabilities of sharing my life intimately with another person.
17. Acting maturely, as you’ve always done
18. Watching more Harry Potter reruns and DVD
19. Curbing my supreme maldita tendencies
20. Appreciating LAW more than ever (I loved law in college, but never imagined that I’d actually fall in love with a lawyer later.)
21. Making sound financial choices
22. Prioritizing better
23. COOKING Sinigang na Baboy
24. Laughing more
25. Appreciating but not being too latched on to our lives and loves
26. Being a better friend
27. Going out of my comfort zone and own set of wants to accommodate preferences and things I wouldn’t have otherwise tried.
I’m sending a cute CDO teddy bear to you (cause you’re so huggable like it), and another virtual gift.
And this blog post. And a text blast from friends I pestered yesterday. But aside from that, I wish you these things for your birthday:
1. I hope you get that big thing we’ve been feverishly BBMing about for days.
2. More travel opportunities (with me in it sana!)
3. Good health and less tummy aches
4. Revisiting your philosophical roots by teaching or further studies
5. That business you’ve been wanting to put up with your good friends
6. More time to really unwind and spend weekends in rejuvenating yourself.
7. Peace of mind and less raccoon eyes
8. More happy memories
9. A full and multi-faceted practice of your profession
10. Deeper prayer life
11. More meaningful life realizations
12. More dates with Mama Mary and Kapitan and Kuya Buboy and Gehgeh… and ehem.
13. More kilig moments
14. Career fulfillment
15. All the provisions you need for the coming years
16. Upgraded cooking skills
17. Cooking skills for me so that I can cook your favorite food
18. Something from the baul (Hahahaha!)
19. A tablet with all of your favorite computer games in it
20. More tight hugs from me
21. Wholesome bonding and more time to give back to your AAA family
22. More happy ventures and adventures
23. The wise insights brought only by age and experience
24. More birthday cakes
25. Unlimited private jokes (haha!)
26. A perpetually sweet and positive outlook in life
27. A happy future… with me.
I guess I am soooo guilty of infinite counts of falling in love with you, Attorney Paul. I still have that will-you-be-my-girlfriend petition saved on my email inbox and well, that’s the most touching love letter I’ve had since I received flowers from guys at age 12 even if you cringe at your past cheesyness.
I hope I get sentenced to a lifetime of imprisonment in your arms.
Happy Birthday Sweetheart! I am so lucky that God made you a part of my life. Please don’t stop being a blessing to me and countless others. One blog post is not enough. I hope that spending the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me will be enough, eventually…
I love you.
(I’ve been meaning to make this post before midnight but… I fell asleep LOL.)