Rejection. Survival. Resources. ;-)
Thanks so much to Lynne Ganda and Kuya LonShaun, for recommending these things I will be sharing in this post.
I had just finished listening to an mp3 sent to me this morning. The title is “Surviving Rejection”. It was not just about a single type of rejection, but all types of rejection from other people. It was very insightful and I wanted to share this to all of you. Here are some quotes lifted from this 44-minute sound file. (The speaker was Pastor Ed Lapiz of Day by Day Ministries.)
“Rejection is a major human problem. In fact it is a major source of human pain.”
“Jesus was rejected because of his unexpected and misunderstood teaching…Jesus found comfort and solace in those who loved and accepted Him.”
“Hindi lang yung katotohanan mo ang totoo. Dapat tayong magbigay puwang sa ibang pananaw.”
“It is difficult to be highly evolved, It is difficult to be different from the rest. Because they
will REJECT you… Even in our lives now, we reject people we do not understand. Pinapalayas, hindi pinapansin, itsa puwera sa mga lakaran…”
“Labeling is judging. Labeling is oversimplification of an individual and it leads to REJECTION. Hindi mo pwedeng sabihing tamad ang isang tao dahil kahit papano ay may natitirang sipag yun. Hindi mo pwedeng sabihing masama ang tao dahil walang perfect na masama. You cannot be perfectly bad. There is always some good left in you.. And when you put labels on someone, you forget the other good qualities that person has.”
“Pinapahirap natin ang buhay ng ating kapwa by rejecting them.”
“Akala ba natin pag sikat tayo we will be accepted? Yes, there will be sectors of society that will accept you. But there will be people who will reject you just because you are famous. You will really know who your true friends are not just in times of failure, but more importantly, in times of success. Because there are people who will not rejoice with you when you are successful, and they will REJECT you. They hate you for being beautiful.”
“Like Jesus, we, you, can get rejected… YOu can get rejected because of your beliefs, your convictions and your truth. Like Jesus you will get rejected because of your position on issues… because of your take on issues. People will reject you because you are misunderstood, because you are different, because you are unusual. People can reject you because of your identity or distinction (dominant characteristics, talents, abilities).”
“They reject other parts, because they accept only one major part of you… By focusing only on one major characteristics, your other facets are ignored and therefore, rejected.”
“We can be rejected because of relations, connections and credentials… People can consider you as a threat and therefore reject you.”
“You are rejected because of your gender, your age, your personal circumstances.”
“Minsan lang ang buhay dito… Maximize whatever is left of your life. Use it for your happiness.”
“We must be sensitive that we don’t reject the other facets of the same person, because it’s part of that person. We are complex… more than labels, professions and titles.”
“We can also get rejected through our other shortcomings and imperfections or just because YOU ARE YOU. Ikaw kasi ikaw, nireject ka tuloy.Kung minsan naman ay hindi naman dahil sayo. Ni-reject ka niya dahil SIYA AY SIYA. Eh sa ayaw niya sayo. May iba siyang gusto, hindi ikaw. Eh di wag. Gusto lang niya parts of you, hindi yung buong you. Eh di wag na lang… Huwag mong ipagsiksikan ang iyong sarili sa may ayaw sa iyo.“
“Ang dami mo ng na-invest na oras, panahon, pag-ibig, pagod, puyat, pawis, dugo… Dapat nagsisimula pa lang, nag-uusap na kayo. Don’t invest your time with people who do not agree with you anyway, dahil maghihiwalay din kayo. Yung iba naman umaasa: babaguhin siya ng aking pag-ibig. Sasamahan ko siya. Mamahalin ko siya… Eh pano kung di iniwan? Ikaw yung nakasangla dahil sugal siya ng sugal! Dapat may kasunduan ang mga samahan… Magme-member ka sa Country Club, titingnan mo muna ang rules… Bago ka umibig ng tuluyan, magkasundo muna kayo, wag kayong pakiramdaman ng pakiramdaman! Iisa lang ang buhay niyo. Paano kung maubos ang oras ninyo tapos hindi naman pala kayo magkasundo? Sayang lang.”
“Relationships can never be one way. They will never last. Kailangan sagutan, tugunan, tulungan. Pareho kayong nagi-invest. After a fairly good effort of being an acceptable and likeable person, do not insist on being accepted. Avoid people who do not like you.”
“Lalo yung mga umiibig-ibig diyan… Huwag ninyong ipagpilitang ibigay ang pagmamahal ninyo sa taong ayaw tumanggap. Dahil may iba namang gustong tumanggap diyan… Dun niyo ibigay… Madali namang mag-adjust yang pagmamahal e… Dun kayo pumunta sa nagmamahal sa inyo… Madaling mahalin yung nagmamahal sa inyo…
Pero yung di ka mahal at ikaw lang yung mahal ng mahal, LUGI KA BUONG BUHAY. Kaya magisip-isip! Kelangan ginagamit ang utak sa pag-ibig…
Madali namang ihulog ang loob…
Natuturuan ang puso. Akala mo lang hindi.“
“God created you. God accepted you. So accept and be at peace with yourself… We must have a certain self-respect because God respects us… Accept people, even and especially those who do not accept you.”
“Well if you reject me, it’s sad but we both lose… Do what you can in a natural, comfortable, and acceptable way to fit. But after having done that and you still don’t fit, just go on being yourself… May katapat ka. May bagay sayo. Kahit kanal may katapat na langit. If the shoe does not fit, don’t wear it. Just go on being yourself, your better self, your best self. Survive small and little acts of rejection… Fill yourself with good things and don’t wallow in such horrible thoughts.”
“I Will Wait for You” by Janette Ikz (Thanks Lynne) is a lyric poem performed live in a Youtube video for an American church group. My friend gave the link to me last week and I listened to it around three times. I had some difficulty understanding some of the words because of the strong black accent, so I had to search for the transcription of the poem.
It is quite long, but there were just some nice lines from that poem that I want to share here:
So why was I surprised when he broke into my heart?
I called 911, but I was cardiac arrested for aiding and abetting,
Cause it was me who let him in…
Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks,
And all he could whisper was sweet, empty nothings –Which meant NOTHING…
You know…. He ‘sort kinda’ right, but ‘sorta kinda’ wrong?
His first name LUKE,
His last name WARM…
I’ll stay in my bed alone,
and write poems about how I will wait for you.
He won’t even come close
Our fingers won’t even interlock
We won’t even exchange breaths
Cause I have thoughts that I’ve ‘saved as’ in a file
that God has only equipped you to open.
I will no longer get weighted down,
From so-called friends & family talks,
About the concern for my biological clock
When I serve the Author of Time.
Who is NOT subject to time,
But I’M subject to Him,
He has the ability to STOP, FAST FORWARD, PAUSE, or REWIND at any given time…
I await your revelation,
but once again from the genesis,
I will wait for you.
I hope it helps some of the people out there who need it badly. 🙂
We could all use some healing love from time to time.